Doctor Flamingo Online

Just Say No

Home
Advice from Doctor Flamingo
Recommended Reading
Special Features
Depression
Surviving Divorce
Just Say No
Less Is More
Easy Relaxation Skill
One Day At a Time
Internet Dating
Finding help in your community
Customize Your Life
Favorite Links
Hobby - Photos to Art
Doctor Flamingo Gifts
Contact Doctor Flamingo

women_walking_say_no_md_clr.gif

FACTS OF THE MATTER:
 
1. Saying YES when you mean NO leads to emotional distress, stomachaches, headaches, and RESENTMENT.  You need to match what you feel inside with what comes out of your mouth.
 
2.  RESENTMENT leads to anger, to rage, and to hurting others and ourselves.  Use RESENTMENT as a barometer...it can tell you when you should be saying NO.
 
3.  Saying NO may create more conflict or distress in the moment but spares you much agony in the long run.
 
4.  Saying NO in a polite, straightforward way is NOT rude.  
 
5.  Saying NO in a polite, straightforward way rarely damages relationships...saying YES when you don't mean it, DOES.
 
6.  Labeling the feeling you get after you say NO as guilt is incorrect.  Guilt is the feeling you should feel when you do something bad...like rob a bank! 
 
7.  That uncomfortable feeling you get when you first practice saying NO simply means you are doing something NEWPat yourself on the back!
 
 

DOCTOR FLAMINGO IS WATCHING YOU!

flamingo_closeup_peeping_md_clr.gif

REMEMBER!

NO IS A COMPLETE SENTENCE!

megaphone_shouting_no_sm_clr.gif

TEN WORST WAYS TO SAY NO
 
10. Isn't it my turn next month?
 
 
9.  I think I hear the teakettle, doorbell, etc.
 
 
8.  I've never done that before.
 
 
7.  I'll check with my husband, mother, etc.
 
 
6.  Sarah's so much better at that.
 
 
5.  My arthritis is so bad today.
 
 
4.  I think I have the grandkids that day.
 
 
3.  I'd love to, but...
 
 
2.  I'll pray about it.
 
 
1.  YES

TEN BEST WAYS TO SAY NO
 
10. NO!  (Forget pleading)
 
 
9.  NO!  (Forget diversions)
 
 
8.  NO!  (Forget feigned imcompetence)
 
 
7.  NO!  (Forget calling in the troops)
 
 
6.  NO!  (Forget false modesty)
 
 
5.  NO!  (Forget whimpering)
 
 
4.  NO!  (Forget lying)
 
 
3.  NO!  (Forget phony excuses)
 
 
2.  NO!  (Forget putting it off on God)
 
 
1.  NO! 

pink_turn_md_clr.gif